Stating The Obvious

Today on ESPN.com, Rod Gilmore asks why Wisconsin is ranked behind Notre Dame and determines that the Badgers lack sex appeal. Since this is an Insider article (which I get for free for reasons which I'm sure you can figure out), I will post some of the relevant points.

Wisconsin is the girl next door. You know the type: smart, dependable and pretty in an average sort of way -- not the drop-dead gorgeous looks of Eva Longoria, Scarlett Johansson or Halle Berry.

Notre Dame is the sexy, glamorous woman every guy wants to date. Wisconsin doesn't have an NFL top pick and cover boy quarterback like Notre Dame's Brady Quinn.

I think it's pretty clear from this comparison above that Notre Dame is Scarlett Johansson, who is the hottest female on the planet. Wisconsin, on the other hand, is the homely girl who even with some new clothes and a new hairstyle would still look pretty gross. It's true. Badger QB John Stocco is really ugly, and I don't think I need to further expound on Brady Quinn's looks.

While it's a shame that Wisconsin will probably be left out of the BCS, that's what happens when you recruit the actual girl next door and not The Girl Next Door (Elisha Cuthbert), who was a porn star.